Down the road

We're off for the journey to The College...bags packed, lists checked off,
Sarah Vaughan in the Mommymobile's CD player,
sigh.
I'm so excited for her, as she has a lovely schedule (including Tales of King Arthur...oooooo!)
and the knowledge that she made it through the first semester with Flying Colors.
Still, we are in the anticipatory Anxiety stage.
"Mom, what if the work is too hard? What if I can't DO it?"
"Honey, I would never ask you to do something I didn't think you were capable of...."
"But, what IF...."
"Sweetie, the work is always hard. That's why it is called Work, and not A Vacation at the Spa.
We find out about ourselves in the challenges that we come up against every day..."
"Oh, you mean like, I found out that I really prefer to work on my OWN and not in a group if at all possible."
"Right."
"And that if I don't like what they are having in the cafeteria I can walk to the store and get something else, but only if I haven't spent my money on puzzle books."
"Right, again."
"But what if I can't figure the next thing out, then what will happen to me?"
"If you can't figure something out, what is the best thing to do?"
"Call you on the cell phone?"
"Well, sometimes, but what about the people at school who are available to help you?"
"OH, the ask for help thing. That's hard for me. I'd rather NOT."
"Yes, I know. It's hard for me, too. I like to do everything perfectly and make it look effortless, and please everybody all of the time, but it isn't always possible."
"So we're sort of ALIKE?"
"YES."
Long, deep silence.
"Mom?"
"YES?"
"I don't want to learn to drive. I'm too afraid I'll make a wrong turn. I pretend I want to learn to drive like everybody else, but I don't."
"That's okay, you don't HAVE TO learn to drive, or even make a decision about it right now."
"But you LOVE to drive...."
"Yes, I do, and it is just like the commercial..."
"Oh, there are passengers and there are drivers..."
"RIGHT."
"But that means we ARE NOT ALIKE."
"Honey, it isn't either/or. It's BOTH/AND."
"That isn't logical."
"Maybe not, but it is TRUE."
"I want to stop talking, now. OKAY?"
"Yes."
It amazes me, really, that we can have these conversations. It has taken a long, long time for this kind of communication to evolve between us, and I always feel so priveleged when she opens up, even a little bit. I always learn a lot about myself.
Here's hoping your weekend is filled with moments of JOY!
namaste.

Comments

[Teresa]

Thanks for sharing...I've got a pleasant knowing smile on my face thinking of the times I've been able to have *those* kind of conversations with my young adults.

~sigh~

[Teresa]

Thanks for sharing...I've got a pleasant knowing smile on my face thinking of the times I've been able to have *those* kind of conversations with my young adults.

~sigh~

[Nathania]

Oh, the sweet girl. Please give her a squeeze for me and tell her that I appreciate the prayers and the candles and the love that you and she both send.

[Debbie]

And the book is coming out when?????? Seriously, Greta its time. Love you, Have fun at school.

[Ann]

Please tell her that she has a friend far away who is hoping hoping hoping that she eventually gets assigned to the p.o. that's right across the street from the cafe because SHE doesn't much like to drive EITHER. xoxo

[Sharlene]

Have a lovely journey and a safe drive. :)

[MaryB]

Oh! I took "The Legend of King Arthur" in college!! I was so excited about taking it that I was afraid it would never live up to the expectations I had for it....but I was wrong, as it was even *better*!

Please share her reading list with me; I would love to know what they're going to work on.

Hope your drive is fun and safe!

[Sharon]

Oh this growing up thing is sometimes so hard! My baby girl just started grad school, and she's still so unsure of her capabilities. Maybe you could adopt her for just a month or so, and see if you can work some magic?

[Laurie]

This is a lovely post, Greta. You capture the essence so well. My last post was a story about my DS, too--growing up so fast.

[Karen]

Oh, Greta. Sometimes I just want to copy your posts and tape them up all over my house. I, too, want to do everything perfectly and make it look effortless. Once, when I was frustrated during a spinning class, the instructor asked me, puzzled, "Do you do everything right the first time?" When I couldn't answer, she exclaimed, "How boring!"

And, just so you and your Girl know, my sweetheart doesn't drive either, and people keep asking him when he will learn (because we have a baby now, you see, and people with babies Need To Learn To Drive). He has admitted to me that he doesn't want to learn... and I rejoiced, because I like to drive and it lets me do something for him. He, in turn, gets to sit in back and play with the baby!

See how it all works out? :)