lifelong knitter

True Yarns

Today's story is brought to you by the marvellous feature in Typepad which allows you to write a story in the middle of the night (when you SHOULD be sleeping, but the words keep waking you UP...) and schedule it for publishing during Normal Working Hours...thereby allowing you to go back to sleep and peruse it before it hits the blog to be sure your nocturnal ramblings are in some way shape or form, coherent. This is an exception to that rule. Incoherent, perhaps, but Personally, Extra Important. (PEI...*hee*) I told you, I SHOULD be sleeping....(excessive use of commas, noted.)
Today is my brother's birthday! Happy Birthday Captain Beeky! I love my brother. He'd be my friend even if we weren't related. We don't agree on a lot of things, and that's perfectly okay. He's a Mensch. In every sense of the word. He is a fabulous Father to the two Most Adorable Nieces in the Universe (IMHO) and takes pictures of them regularly in the wacky handknitted items that Auntie Greta makes. He sees my number on caller ID and answers "tech support" before I can even describe the problem. He calls sometimes just to check in, because it has been awhile. He's adorable. Really. Check your local listings, cuz he's on TV pretty regularly. If you are a Motorhead, you know him from RPM tonight, or the CART pits. Yep, THAT's my baby bro....my Fedex driver was THRILLED last year when I got him an autographed picture for his truck. Wow...how do you know HIM? Look at the picture, dude? See the resemblance? The guys at the Honda dealer also proudly display his picture and boast that they do the maintenance on MY truck. Now, ordinarily, I am NOT impressed by celebrity. Nor do I use it to get better service. What impresses me is when people are really really good at what they do, especially when they do it LIVE in front of a critical audience, with a director yelling at them through headphones and wires running everywhere and they've only had two hours sleep because the baby has colic and the airport was shut down for three hours because of a security snag but they STILL smile and sign autographs and do the job to the best of their ability because, well, because that is the way it should be DONE. With Integrity and humility and hours and hours of prep work that nobody ever sees. We're still in the midst of Silly Season, so I can't tell you for sure when he'll be on next...but in my eyes, when the Green flag drops and the Bulls**t stops, there's my brother, P1, dude!
Stay tuned Danger Girl fans....Pictures tomorrow of Actual Finished Objects....

It's catching

I stood too close to Cromarty while I was with Rachael and kiwi caught the dreaded Yarn Eating Syndrome......... (YES, I meant to do that (bonus points for Pee-Wee Herman fans)...*hee*)
I carefully calculated yardage needed for kiwi. I did. I even swatched, washed, and blocked. I posted PICTURES, remember? Everything was going along just FINE and then kiwi spent a couple of days alone with Cromarty and NOW...Lordie. I had to unravel my swatch to finish the second sleeve (and did, just barely, with cm to spare...) Since the body of kiwi is made from a handspun, hand dyed batch, what to do for the shawl collar? Brainstorm at 2AM one night last week...I had the PERFECT complement, already in my stash. I calculated the yardage. I swatched, I washed, I blocked. (No rest for the weary here.) I made it HALFway through the collar and it was clear...I NEED.more.yarn. How can that BE? Today I had to try two different places, but YAY, found the exact dyelot. Bought TWO skeins, just in case. Hopefully by the weekend, kiwi will be blocking on the new board. I've quarantined Rogue, just in case....

What's THAT?

If you said, "Why, I do believe that is water resistant exterior rigid foam insulation, that Greta is about to turn into a Knitter's Blocking Board", well then, RIGHT you are!
If, on the other hand, you said "WHHHAAAAAT"? I still love you. Always will. I'll make you one, too.
Here's the deal. I've been reading about these homemade blocking boards and I wanted something LIGHTWEIGHT (I can lift this 4foot by 8foot sheet with two fingers and an opposable thumb...) CHEAP (under nine bucks) EASY TO STORE (under the bed) and Original (I'm going to make a fitted sheet type cover for mine out of Painters Canvas with a grid I draw myself....to match my Own Personal Preferences).
The reason it looks like the beginnings of a Science Fair Project is because I *hinged* it in the Parking Lot of ManLand (thanks go out to ryan for THAT moniker) to the amusement of the small crowd of onlookers. (It was before 8am you understand...) Imagine if you will, a blonde knitter, striding out of the Home Improvement Wharehouse with said sheet of Insulation. I approach my rather smallish (oh YEAH, wanna compare GAS mileage? I thought not.) vehicle, holding her own in a virtual SEA of Contractors Tonka Toys.
Insulation is larger than the interior space of the vehicle. I know this, but can't resist playing with their minds. Cat toys. Anyhooo...I pretend to look perplexed. I look at the Insulation, at the Cr-V, back at the Insulation. Half a dozen pairs of eyes are now watching me. pause for dramatic effect. Okay, full house.
I put the sheet on the ground, balanced on the skinny edge and reach into my pocket for my Leather(WO)man tool. Quickly cut two notches, a third of the way from each edge. Put the tool away and SNAP the lines across my knee, thereby creating a LOVELY (if I do say so myself) folded blocking board which fits PRECISELY in back of the driver's seat. I jump into the truck and adjust my rearview mirror to see the jaws hanging open. *hee* I push the button to lower the driver's side window, turn UP the Indigo Girls, and WAVE....buh bye boys!

UnLEADed

I now have two large holes in my dining room ceiling, a hole in the bathroom floor, and another in the floor of the closet. We won't even begin to discuss the sinkhole in the bank account.
The Pesky Plumbing Problem has been identified and solved. At last.
After four hours of replacing the old galvanized pipes to the tub, the sink, and the commode, success was declared (prematurely) and the water was turned back on at the meter. The plumbers ran a "test", filling the tub with a small amount of water and letting it drain out. Which it promptly did, through the recently repaired dining room ceiling and onto my favorite piece of antique cherry furniture.
To quote one of my favorite episodes...."What a revoltin' development THIS is...."
After a lunch break, they returned with a ladder and a tarp and a sheet rock saw.
Lo and behold, an ancient, handmade, LEAD drain, leaking like the proverbial sieve, was revealed. (Along with a lot of rotten wood, but I digress....)
Four more hours later, all new pipes and drains and all the accompanying accessories are tested and deemed "up to code".
In addition to Real Electricity, cable tv,and DSL, I now have Real Indoor Plumbing, and a migraine.
Tomorrow I will begin the attempt to get on the waiting list for the sheetrock repair guys. Sheetrock dust and I have a *history* which almost always results in a trip to the Emergency Room for the Breathing Therapy. My friendly neighborhood Family Physician informed me last time that challenging my lungs again could be Even More Serious. I don't want to know about ANYTHING more serious than not being able to breathe while the Intake ER Nurse looks horrified as I pass out BEFORE filling out the required paperwork...Nope. Been there, done that, have the t-shirt. Waiting list, here I come.
Thanks to all of you who nearly simultaneously diagnosed my inablity to post pictures as a Browser Issue.
I was on Safari, when I should have been Exploring...
Of Course.

Testing

Stars on ICE

I was on the verge of a full fledged panic attack yesterday, or so I thought. Last night was to be my first time Driving at Night since the eye surgery and I was freaking out. I'm all ABOUT Driving, dontcha know...so I could not for the life of me figure out why everytime I thought about driving to the Big City to see the Ice Skating I had visions of a fiery crash. I'm SO not prone to imagining worst case scenario car crashes. That would be my Mother's department. I'm in charge of Wishful Thinking, and DRIVING.
I did the anxiety drills...thought about it LOGICALLY, and still. Fiery crash. BIG one. DANG.
Daughter was so excited about this show (albeit SENSING my mood she said "Are you SURE you can drive?") and we took the Wonderful Woman who came over every single day I was away and read poetry to Tasha (Edgar Allen Poe) while watching the History Channel with the cats. How Blessed am I? Big Time.
We piled into the Mommymobile and headed down the road. At the junction where the two major freeways diverge, I took the road less travelled. Not the one in my *imaginary* narrative. Both passengers immediately began the Questioning. Why was I going THIS way? THIS isn't the way to the Big City...blah blah blah. I just said well, I thought this might be less crowded and changed the subject. We sailed along, made great time and I was measureably calmer. I felt perfectly FINE once I made the decision to take the Other Way.
The show was beyond fabulous.in.every.way.
It was over a little after 10 pm (which qualifies as DARK, for those of you keeping track) and we headed out to the parking lot. Sat in the endless sea of cars waiting to get OUT of the parking lot and chatted about how amazing, how thrilling, how WONDERFUL the show had been. I'm not exactly sure HOW it happened, but with all of the orange safety cones lined up everywhere we ended up going out of the complex in a direction I had never been before. No other cars around, and no streetlights. I activated my Sense of Direction, and kept up the chit chat about the music, the costumes, the lighting...SOMEHOW, an hour later, we arrived home without ever having set tires on the Fiery Freeway.
Got up this morning and sleepily opened the paper.
Front Page story...Navy jet..fiery crash...freeway at a standstill for hours....
Well now, THAT explains everything. Like the goosebumps I have now.
This is Danger Girl, reporting LIVE from the Twilight Zone.
Oh, and for those of you tuning in for glamour shots of Chocolate, or Knitting...I can get the photos to iphoto from the card reader (which seems like MAGIC!) but can't get them over to Typepad. There isn't a *browse* button the way there was on the PC, and I REFUSE to go back, or give UP, for that matter.

Questing

I'm off to procure a card reader (THANKS for the tech support!) so that I can post pictures of the amazing Valomilks! See Mariko for details. Suffice to say that yesterday when I needed a break (and functioning Facilities) I turned lunch into an opportunity to Quest. FOR CHOCOLATE!
Oh, baby. Now I am picky about chocolate, leaning more toward the Milk and away from the Dark Side...and not much of a marshmallow-in-the-middle kinda gal. Might I just say, MMMMMM. Further taste testing WILL be required. Repeatable results, and all that Jazz.
I will skip the gory details of the Pesky Plumbing Project and go straight to the good news....
Mom got her stitches out and the pathology came back CLEAN, which means they got it all, Woo and Hoo! I am hugely relieved, and oh so happy for her. Thanks as always for the support and prayers, it really does make all the difference in the Universe.
Now I must be off to the Post Office, to spread the joy of Valomilks far and wide (and to reduce the temptation to become likewise....) and then on to get Gadgets!
Stay tuned, as tomorrow I will attempt to dazzle you with my newly acquired gizmos.
Watch me pull a Rabbit out of my hat, Rock.

Hey, it's US!

Snowbell and Saracat here...Mommy says we can tell you a story today because she has to deal with a Plumbing Problem. We don't like these Plumbing Problems onelittlebit, no we do NOT, although we heard some very interesting new words this morning, and if we knew how to spell our way out of a paper bag, we'd share them with you....
First, before we tell ANY stories, we want to send out a big MEOWR to all the kitties out there whose people are proudly taking pictures and posting them on the blogs...Oh, We see Digit and Adah and Bea and Scout and Lucy...can you see us waving? Well, of course you can't! Our Mommy, unlike yours, has her priorities all out of whack. I'm sure you agree that the first order of business when you switch over to a new computer is to make sure your camera is compatible with the operating software and take lots of adorable kitty cat pictures to test it all out, reward your kitty models with special treats (as is specified in our CONTRACT) and post them prominently so that other cats, whilst walking atop THEIR people's keyboards can have something gorgeous to look at....
It's all about US, anyway...but you KNEW that, so, okay, now we'll tell you the story.
We are both rescue kitties. I'm sure you know what this is...when a person comes to a certain stage in their lives when they NEED some help, the word goes out and one of us shows up on their doorstep to rescue them..... We've heard silly stories about people who actually sleep through the night, every NIGHT without the exercise they need. This is very very bad for People. They NEED to be awakened at least two or three times a night so they don't lose their ability to see in the dark. We take turns at this important job and since our mommy had eye surgery we know it is VERY important for her to regain her Night Vision. We've been extra helpful. We move the dishes around so that she can practice her agility, and since we know it is harder for her to focus lately, we leave our presents of cave crickets and spiders in the sink, right where she can see them as soon as she turns on the light to fill our water bowls. We thought since we had been so extra helpful she would move Knitting the Kitty Beds to the top of that LIST thing.
Here's the POINT of our story. We need your help. Please remind our Mommy of the Importance of Structure and the making of Lists. She has forgotten some of this since the BOY has moved out. WE think she'd cry a little less and not miss him so much if she'd concentrate on setting a Goal (which would be Knitting The Kitty Beds) and breaking it down into small, easily accomplished tasks (like feeding the cats, petting the cats, letting the cats sleep in the noro pile while the beds are being KNIT....)
Gosh, we're exhausted from all this typing. Time to go upstairs and see what all that NOISE is about. We thought we heard something like the whole floor has to be ripped up, but that can't be right, can it? Why would you need to rip up the FLOOR when the water is running down through the WALLS into the kitchen? Oh well, she'll take care of it. Now which button should we push? Oh there it is, PUBLISH.
As you were....

Let the MAGIC begin...

One of my very wise painting teachers once told me that all of the magic begins for women at 50. Just you WAIT, she said, eyes twinkling, you'll SEE! So my dear friend Debbie and I often say "Are we 50 yet?" when we have those painful days of everything seeming to go so Wrong....no matter how hard we try...
Last night I was too exhausted to even think about opening my mail. I had two fabulous boxes (which since the return addresses give it away I KNOW are filled with fabulous fiber to knit with...) which are still sitting just inside the front door. There was another odd shaped envelope though, with lovely stamps and O.M.G. (really, how IS it, that just when you NEED a dose of magic it comes right in through the mail slot all the way from the other side of the Pond?)
Yeah, okay, so it is still WAY too cold for me out there this morning. I will bundle up in my layers and venture out to try and make a difference....but in HERE? Warm and toasty and filled with sweet dreams....
You KNOW who you are....may the Blessings be multiplied a thousand fold, dearest.
And, YES, I will try to figure out a way to always say YES. Count me IN.
In Knitting news, I've stopped starting new things and have set up a PLAN for finishing the Projects at hand. Sleeves for kiwi first, as I found the PERFECT buttons for that sweater while on the trip. Sleeves for Sonnet, next. Remember Sonnet? The Chicami twinset tank for under Sonnet. Sleeves (and hood) for Rogue. See the trend here? When you are up to your armpits in alligators, and it is difficult to remember that your orginal objective was to drain the swamp, KNIT SLEEVES.
No wonder I'm exhausted. My Brain is full, may I be excused?

Well, shush my mouth....

While I was whining about freezing, maggi wrote a fabulous POEM....
reminding me once again
that it is all about PERSPECTIVE
and the People you meet along the way....
I sincerely apologize.
I have no idea what got into me.....
but whatever it was,
POETRY is the cure.